Toilet training

There are few things of more significance in a young Ghyllian's development than their toilet training. Indeed, it has been suggested that the only thing more significant is the question one is given by his or her Hive-Lord. The famous developmental psychoalchemist, Dr. B. J. Spook, spent quite a bit of his early professional career researching the effects that toilet training variation and mishap had on later mental development. His findings were quite interesting. According to Dr. Spook, if a developing whelp's toilet training is started too young, the little blighter will no doubt become an over-achiever. If, on the other hand, the wee savage is allowed to wallow in its own excrement too long, it quite likely will end up becoming something beastly, like an editor. Dr. Spook's research into this aspect of Ghyllian development has generated quite a bit of interest in recent years.

Indeed, it is this popular psychoalchemical theory that gave rise to such wild speculations about the famous inventor Harv Gretborn's toilet training. Dr. Spook speculated that Gretborn's particular genius is the result of being allow to evacuate freely in the Qestarius River, but at an early age. The good doctor feels that the peculiar combination of an early start and the unnatural liberation of not wearing diapers resulted in an unrivaled creative mind. Unfortunately, back then no one kept the detailed records of juvenile bowel movements that we do now, so it is all speculation.

Of course, it is well known how Pyxies love to meddle in the toilet training of assorted creatures, mainly as revenge for having it forced on them before they change form. However, less well known is the potential that such interference has for causing a zymenadang complex, or worse. In fact, there is an entire wing in the archives of the Unquisition dedicated to recording such tragedies which has been funded by Dr. Spook's now famous book, Dr. Spook's The Brown Basics, Toilet Training Your Tot.

Citations: Harv Gretborn, Unquisition, zymenadang.

--Doctor Phineas Crank 21:50, 3 Mar 2005 (EST)