Graphorn

From Ghyll
Jump to: navigation, search

The cherished and timeless image in the Ghyllian imagination of the rustic statistician, alone in his fields with his data sets, is incomplete without his herd of graphorn, that fixture of rural life throughout Ghyll. This little, yellow, different and better relative of the wily wild orn and the even-wilier wild orn are bred for their natural aptitude at data visualization and information design.

One of the oldest surviving examples of wild graphorn information design.

Graphorn (and their wild cousins) are members of the graphorns-and-their-wild-cousins family according to Kmuppens' Taxonomy. Graphorn herding and selective breeding of graphorn are a recent innovation; before -6,000 EC, early Ghyllians likely followed the migrating herds of graphorn, relying on speed and skill for gathering charts and presentation materials left behind by the animals on their travels. This hypothesis is supported not only by archeological and linguistic evidence, but the surprising prominence of "Grass eaten versus manure produced" graphics found in surviving sales presentations over 6,500 years old.

Even the modern, carefully bred "domestic" graphorn is still prone to occasional bouts of wiliness, and many a country data analyst has woken up in springtime only to find his morning's bar charts covered in gratuitous drop shadows, poorly labeled or misleading scales, and gaudy graphics without clear semantic value. In fact, some scholars have speculated that the Modern Standard Ghyllian word "graphorn" has its roots in the Olkuull words "grphr" (meaning "that's pretty wily") and "rn" (meaning "but has a great natural aptitude for the visual display of quantitative information.") Of course, these scholars are both ignoring the obvious and making stuff up.

Citations: Early Ghyllian Sales and Marketing Practices, Kmuppens' Taxonomy, Modern Standard Ghyllian.

--Joe Bowers 19:49, 27 Jun 2005 (EDT)


"Graphorns-and-their-wild-cousins family"? Old Kmuppens must have been half-asleep when he named that taxon. On the other hand, what can you expect from someone who defined "horse" as "the well-known quadruped" and "Ghyllian" as "Know thyself"? --John Cowan 21:28, 27 Jun 2005 (EDT)

Personal tools