Ninja Burger PBP Episode 26 - 12/19/06
Dice roll summary:
Whutaguy/Skipito (Deliverator): 08 = 10
Arvo/Toru (Driver): 43 = 7
Zipdrive/Kitaro (Chef): 44 = 8
Lorthyne/Bozuko (Spotter): 28 = 6
Wroe/Rin (Navigator): 45 = 9
Character Stats --> http://www.gamegrene.com/node/679
DELIVERY PIRATES: 31 = 4 (using the timestamp from my last post)
Poor [-2] Sense of Decency
Good [+2] Pirate Pizza Employee
Expert [+4] Carjacking
PIRATE CAPTAIN: 31 = 4 (ditto)
Poor [-2] Fashion Sense
Expert [+4] Escaping At the Last Minute
Master [+6] Pirate Captain
In the van...
Rin turns her wiring diagram into a lesson in pain, wrenching the pirate's arms behind his back and taking his head for a little trip to cabinet-land. Since this involves technology I'm going to give you the bonus from your Good [+2] Computer Nerd, so that means it's an 11 ( 9 + 2) vs the Pirate's pitiful 6 (4 + 2 Pirate = 6). No contest. The Pirate takes 5 ranks of damage, which reduces everything he has to -2. He is out cold and down for the count.
Poor [-2] Sense of Decency
Good [+2] Pirate Pizza Employee --> Average  --> Poor [-2]
Expert [+4] Carjacking --> Good [+2] --> Average  --> Poor [-2]
Meanwhile, in an effort to avoid being disemboweled, Toru decides to put on a show of things, and slumps to his knees, feigning death. I don't think that Stunt Driver applies, but I will give you the +2 from Smooth Talker and we can assume (7 + 2 = 9) that you manage to mutter out some choice dying words that the Pirate, in his hubris, bends close to listen to. This pretty much opens him up to a sneak attack by either you or Rin.
On the stairs...
The pirate dodges left and right, but Bozuko stays on him, distracting the pirate with a beer bottle to the ceiling, followed by some intricate maneuvering around the room (6 + 4 Chucking Things + 2 Finding Use for Garbage + 2 Acting Ninja = 14). In the wake of such ninja awesomeness, the pirate can do little but cower, and you successfully pin him to the wall with the antlers and head up the stairs.
One side effect of your actions is that a small barroom brawl begins on the main floor, with the patrons all hurling beer bottles. This may become an issue when you come back downstairs, you realize.
Skipito and Kitaro face off against the Pirate Captain, who snarls and, as pirates are wont to do, begins to look for escape (4 + 4 = 8). He finds one, and begins to back towards the window, realizing that he is no match for two ninja bouncing all over the hallway.
Kitaro pulls something sharp from his apron and leaps (8 + 2 = 10) just as the Angry Turtle power of Skipito Friskito comes full bore, with the ninja hurling pepper powder and charging low with his katana.
Alas, if there's one thing Pirate Captains are good at, it's running away, and the Pirate's Expert [+4] Escaping At the Last Minute quality trumps all other relevant qualities in play, in terms of initiative. Thus it is that when the mighty ninja blades of the two ninja meet, the strike only thin air, for the Pirate Captain has already leapt out the window.
However, as previously mentioned, the remnants of the fire escape were rather precariously perched, and the extra weight of the Pirate Captain sends everything, groaning, towards the ground. But physics being what they are, the beam which previously held the bag full of Ninja Burger food see-saws, and when the Pirate goes down, the food goes up, sailing into the air, like... like...
Like a bag of food that you'd better catch before it spills.